How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize