I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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