he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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