How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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