the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize