Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
