i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
