i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize