I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Randomize
