Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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