So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
