yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
