How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
