Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize