"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
