We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
