We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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