im drinking this country out of the recession.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
