I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
