If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
