I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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