"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
ttyl tear gas
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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