the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
too bad you live with your parents still
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
