...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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