sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize