What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Let's get the cat blown out
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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