There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
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