Duck Duck Cougar?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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