Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
