Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
