dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
