let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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