hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
