Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Randomize