Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
