We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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