Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Randomize