when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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