I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
