Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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