i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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