When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
