he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.