Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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