But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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