All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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