Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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