Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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