Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
