lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
